Last week, we implored readers to dish their holiday-decorating war stories in hopes of winning an immediate fix for all past horrors: a bundle of Canvas tabletop products curated by the line's founder and designer, Andrew Corrie. In our Inbox flocked some pretty hilarious tales—including one about a dead miniature parrot named Pedro—but the story below takes the cake:
"The date: December 25, 2007. Twenty-six people were invited for a family gift exchange and a luncheon. Things seemed to be going well except for a heated exchange between two family members. While the overgrown children were bickering, I lit the candles on the antique table my husband inherited from his grandparents. I tried to get everybody's attention and clapped my hands but unfortunately elbowed a wreath that fell over into a candle. A few weeks before, my husband gave me a puppy as an early Christmas present. This commotion excited the puppy, who jumped off the couch into the Christmas tree. The tree fell over into a window. All at the same time, the tablecloth caught fire, the two family members began to fight, the puppy took his leave out the broken window and ran out into the street.
A car coming down the road swerved to avoid the puppy and crashed into a neighbor's fence. The table caught on fire and began to burn. The two adult family members were threatening to call the police on each other. Someone dragged a garden hose from outside into the dining room and soaked the antique table along with all the food. The end result? Extra people at our house for Christmas: firefighters and police. Since that Christmas, we have either gone to someone else's house to celebrate or stayed home."
· Dish the Holiday Decorating Tales, Enter to Win Canvas Tabletop! [Curbed National]