Freelance writer and editor (and former lighting/interiors editor at Architectural Record) William Weathersby has a great eye for gift giving. Yet he's harnessed by a perennial problem: receiving. He can't technically get married in the traditional sense, at least not in most U.S. states. He’s gay. So he sought a single gal pal with equally refined taste and no pre-existing nuptial plans: Curbed National correspondent and Weathersby's fellow Southerner, a one Miss Sarah F. Cox. In a New Year’s haze of libations, licentiousness, and a smattering of greed, Weathersby and Cox decided to become affianced. Expressly for the gifts. (And for the opportunity to author this very post jointly.) So if you were wondering what to get them now that word has leaked out through their Facebook relationship statuses, below please find a curatorial selection of baubles, bricolage, and booty the soon-to-betrothed have in mind. And if you lose this post or forget to bookmark it, please direct yourself to the couple's wedding website. (What? That's not your homepage?)
1: Customized i-Case III trunk, $54,700, Pinel & Pinel. [link]
Why she likes it: Already in possession of an iPhone, it seems silly to make the small upgrade to an iPad when there's an entire portable office to iTrump all the other iJunk.
Why he likes it: That’s one big pocket office. What size are the pants!
2. The entire miniature seating selection, $130 to $670, MoMA Design Store. [link]
Why she likes it: Sit down? Hell no. Both of our firm asses still look mighty fine upright, thank you. Instead, let's get $4,010 worth of furniture that friends can neither sit upon nor sully with red wine stains. (William’s soirees tend to get out of hand.)
Why he likes it: The houseboy can Swiffer everything within a minute flat.
3. The New English dinnerware, $97 for a cup and saucer, SWITCHMODERN. [link]
Why she likes it: The Inkhead pattern by Florian Hunter reminds me of a tattoo’d dude I once dated. That reminds me, where's his number?
Why he likes it: I can’t decide between the insects-atop-the-plate pattern, Entomo Black by Monica Tsang, or Lisa Turner’s Anatomica, which is perfect for a Silence of the Lambs buffet (lamb with fava beans paired with a lovely chianti.) Plus, SWITCHMODERN's proprietor, Roy Otwell, is a hottie.
4. Fornace Venini Geacolor vase “in process”, $19K, Moss. [link]
Why she likes it: Colorful and obscure. Let’s help this exquisite SoHo store stay in business if nothing else. $19,000 for a fugly vase—boy, I landed the right guy.
Why he likes it: Mouth. Blown. Enough. Said. Plus, Murray M. has had enough tax troubles of late, so let’s offer a helping hand. And its designer is Gae! (Aulenti).
5. Bleu Nature's Nilleq Stools, $5,998, Barneys. [link]
Why she likes it: Looks like a good hard wood to me. And with Simon Doonan (Mr. Jonathan Adler) being recently named—perhaps downgraded?—to Barneys Creative Ambassador-At-Large, why not invest in solid goods in this economy?
Why he likes it: Always go with a hard wood. And at $5,998, we're not exactly asking you to spend six grand, people.
6: Lifetime membership to David Barton Gym, approx $1,400 annually. [link]
Why she likes it: William, isn’t this where Anderson Cooper works out?
Why he likes it: I’ll be in the locker room with a CNN “feed” for a while if you need me, Cox.
7. The Paris Dogs Bed, Chien Vivant Couture, $1,650. [link]
Why she likes it: I'm bringing the pup, Raleigh, into this relationship. Hellooo, puppy daddy!
Why he likes it: As long as that little bitch is nowhere near my separate bedroom she can have anything she wants.
8: Poltrona Frau's Lullaby Due Bed, $14,859, SWITCHMODERN. [link]
Why she likes it: Austin Powers Alert: Designed in 1968 by Luigi Massoni, this round bed is ultra-sweet. As they advertise, “The bed headrest is fitted on a 360° rotating base that swivels both clockwise and counter-clockwise, thanks to wheels fitted inside the base.” A set of cotton sheets is also included. Ready to rock.
Why he likes it: Don't even try, Cox—it's going in my room.
9. Mattermade's Ceres G chandelier by Lindsey Adelman, $9,100. [link]
Why she likes it: Its linear profile looks like a connect-the-dots or Etch-A-Sketch drawing. And if you're marrying the former lighting editor of Architectural Record magazine—full disclosure, I was William’s intern there without any on-the-record hanky-panky—why not shed some light?
Why he likes it: It’s a steal at $9,100, a limited edition of 10, and, as designer Lindsey Edelman says, “chestnuts, acorns and twigs can be found affixed to arms and joints.” Festive!
10. Schlumberger Aquamarine “Bee” Ring, price upon request, DK Farnum Estate Jewelry. [link]
Why she likes it: Why was this not my engagement ring! It's 18-carat, bi-color gold with .75 carats worth of diamonds. A rectangular-cut aquamarine—William’s birthstone, a plus—and the diamonds are single, round, and marquise. It's an iconic piece of hand candy. Plus, it can be sized.
Why he likes it: Sarah is a size queen, too—that's part of our love connection—and is the price truly the question?
11. In-kind donation to Charity Water. [link]
Why she likes it: Because as crass and materialistic as the world may be, impoverished people always need clean water.
Why he likes it: Because, like Sarah, I have a heart, too. And I love her.
—Sarah F. Cox and William Weathersby
· Decor Shop Faces Tax Troubles For One Week [Curbed National]
· Simon Doonan Ousted from Creative Director Position and "Promoted" to Creative Ambassador-at-Large [Racked National]
· Past columns authored by Sarah F. Cox [Curbed National]