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The First Official Million Dollar Decorators Mad Libs

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We've always known that Martyn Lawrence-Bullard and his Million Dollar Decorators castmates have the potential to liven up TV's soggy stable of design shows. There were not one but two false starts, but at long last the show will officially premiere on Tuesday at 10 p.m on Bravo. After a raucous media conference call two weeks ago—in which Rachel Zoe's decor was described as "scary" and series star Kathryn Ireland presented forth her wildly popular "Detox during the day, and retox at night" mantra—today Lawrence-Bullard is the subject of an interview in the New York Times Currents column. Things learned: he played opposite Eartha Kitt in the 1998 comedy I Woke Up Early the Day I Died, October 18 is officially "Martyn Lawrence-Bullard" day in West Hollywood, and people in China walk around with a photo of his face as their phone background.

As for what to make of Lawrence-Bullard's Times interview...

How did you get so many celebrity clients?

I came over to L.A. with_____[noun]_____in my eyes. I thought I was going to be this actor. Of course, I_____[past tense verb]_____fairly fast. I flailed around a little bit, and after a while, I ended up getting a role in a movie where I played opposite
_____[famous person]_____. A sort of boy toy, which was _____[adjective]_____.

Are the demands of celebrity clients different from those of mere mortals?

More than my_____[noun]_____, they want to_____[verb]_____their fantasies. For example, Cher wanted to _____[verb]_____—she wanted to feel like she was the_____[noun]_____of a maharajah. That was one of her requests. Elton’s apartment here in L.A. — he wanted this_____[adjective]_____’70s,“Boogie Nights” kind of vibe, which went with the architecture of the building.

What was the brief for Sharon Osbourne’s apartment, which you renovate on [Million Dollar Decorators]?

Sharon and I have been_____[adjective]_____friends. _____[Famous person]_____introduced us. He took us on a safari in____[geographic location]_____as a Christmas present. Sharon and I completely_____[past tense verb]____on this trip. When we came back, Sharon had me create a very chic_____[noun],_____which is in a place called Hidden Hills.

When I finished that, suddenly Sharon got this gig on the show_____["show title"]._____The problem is that her call time is 6 a.m., so she wanted to be closer to town. It’s an apartment in the building where I had decorated town apartments for_____[famous person]_____and_____[famous person]_____. Sharon literally gave me two weeks to gut this apartment that belonged to an Arab princess and was_____[adjective]_____everywhere. The ceilings were painted to look like_____[noun]_____. Unbelievably, it was right when we started filming the show.

Were you reluctant to be on a reality TV show, given the confidential nature of your work?

I’m very lucky in that so many of____[plural noun]_____are such great _____[plural noun]_____. I mean, I go on vacation with_____[famous person]_____every year; I spend Christmas with_____[famous person]._____ I’m such friends with so many of my clients, and they_____[verb]_____me. So I knew that I’d be able to get content with my clients, because we have that_____[noun]._____ They knew that I would look after them. And I knew that would_____[verb]_____us.

Do you think viewers will be surprised by the less-than-glamorous behind-the-scenes work involved in high-end interior design?

I think people will be surprised. A lot of my clients think I just swan around in designer outfits, wave the_____[noun]_____and it happens. It may look glamorous pulling up in a_____[car type]_____and running around town shopping with a _____[adjective]_____American Express card, but the reality is that it’s grunt work. You know, sometimes I get down on my hands and knees to_____[verb]_____for these people. I may be in the top echelon of my career, but believe me, it’s still a service industry and I understand that.

· How Martyn Lawrence-Bullard Will Bring Bravado Back to Bravo [Curbed National]
· Sound the Trumpets: Million Dollar Decorators Announces April Premiere Date [Curbed National]
· Million Dollar Decorators Pushed Back [Curbed National]
· Million Dollar Decorators Premiere Date Announced [Curbed National]
· Million Dollar Decorators: Gold-Leaf Garages, Housewives, More! [Curbed National]
· A Celebrity Designer in the Service of Glamour [NYT]