From the outside, this 13,000-square-foot Mediterranean-style mansion in Thousand Oaks, Calif., looks like a lovely place to live. After all, it perches on 22 acres of the valley with a pool, lots of patio space, and views of greenery galore. Step inside the Ron Firestone-designed palace, though, and the scenery takes a drastic turn for the tacky, what with upholstery fabrics in every shade of beige and rose, over-the-top passementerie, and sconces dripping with crystals and tassels. The seven-badroom, 7.5-bathroom mansion, which was built in 2004, is asking $13.995M. Let's hope the guys who buy it have some spare cash left over to give those good-lookin' bones a well-deserved makeover.