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Shockingly, This Gilded Manse is Failing to Bring in a Bride

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All photos via Glass Tire

For years now St. Petersburg denizen Don Milisav Juan Gonzales Brzi has been looking to snag a 16- to 20-year-old bride, using his gilded chateau as the juicy worm at the end of the line. Here's how the "39-year-old" sells it:

"To all unmarried ones who would like to spend their life by my side and within all the beauties of my home. Please look below at all the magic of my home that I have decorated with taste, perhaps just for YOU." Surprisingly, his gilded manse is failing to bring all the girls to the yard, though it's hard to pinpoint exactly why. Could it be the naked mattress? The funeral flower arrangements? The ceaseless dedication to strange tile tableaus? Or (most likely) the Colonel Sanders lookalike in the foreground who just won't go away? We'll never know. · Found Art: Serbian Groom Trolls for Bride [Glass Tire via Jezebel]
· Russian Speaker Wanted to Help Decode Baroque Decor [Curbed National]