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The Conclusive Guide to Opening a Quintessential B&B

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Have a little extra capital to play with? Want to be your own boss? Live in the Berkshires? Want to be a little bit more like Tori Spelling? If any of these questions garnered anything greater than a resounding "eh," then odds are you're in business to open a bed and breakfast. What goes into such an undertaking? Well, much more than a bathroom key attached to a wooden spoon and lots of chintz—though those are requisites. Intrigued? Check out Curbed's index of B&B necessities for every aspiring hospitality entrepreneur, below:

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And now, in more detail...

1. Let's make something very clear, right off the bat: there is no such thing as too much chintz. If it's made of fabric, it better have tiny pink flowers on it.
2. Approximately 16 pounds of drapery.
3. A TV from about 1994.
4. Fire hazards. Bonus points if it involves a stubborn cat.
5. Americana bunting.
6. At least one (1) creepy old dog, preferably with a heart of gold.
7. An unlimited supply of doilies. And then some more doilies.
8. A pitiable creeping plant display, like this sad, half-assed flower trellis.
9. Towel animals.
10. Ghosts of women scorned.
11. Frightening old portraits of people watching you toss and turn.
12. Matching wallpaper and drapes. See point 1.
13. Ah yes, the smashed window suite, a best-seller!
14. The friendly innkeeper. [photo]
15. The grumpy innkeeper. [photo]
16. Cherubim.
17. A 'For Sale' sign.
18. Seven different kinds of (chintz) print.
19. An American flag.
20. Pictures of sailboats.
21. Stuffed animals in case patrons need a good snuggle.
22. The best part of a good B&B: the fresh-baked cookie smell.
23. And, of course, the "I-swear-I-said-non-smoking-room" smell.
24. Oil paintings of ducks. Forget the cookie smell, this is actually the best thing about B&Bs.

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