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L.A.'s No. 1 Pleasure Palace Returns With $24.25M Pricetag

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Now for only $24.25M L.A.'s most eligible, wealthy man-child can live in the clubbiest, pinballsiest listing the city has to offer. This place in L.A.'s cash-infused Holmby Hills enclave has everything: a two-story library, three elevators, at least one lavish bedroom that looks just like the haunted room in Jane Eyre, a palatial bathroom done up in enough zebra marble to cue cravings for cookies and cream, a dalmatian throw blanket, an actual dalmatian (probably not included), a Greco-Roman nightclub, aquariums, pinball, and enough pool mosaic to line the road to El Dorado.

The place has been around "since Jesus rode dinosaurs around the La Brea Tar Pits," writes Curbed LA, a turn of phrase that apparently means "since the '90s." The price for the 27,816-square-foot manse peaked in 2006, when it re-entered the market asking $27.5M, and most recently blipped on and off the market in December. Research indicates that La Villa Consolata has flickered on and off the market since 1997, having last sold in 1990 for $5.35M. The place is rumored to have been rented by the likes of Donatella Versace, Janet Jackson and Tommy Hilfiger, which seems like good news for the men of One Direction, who've recently had a grand old time renting out L.A.'s other hideous, nightclub-loaded, market languishing spread. See? There's a home for everybody.

· 330 South Mapleton Drive, L.A., Calif. [Redfin]
· Hideous Holmby Hills Mansion With Its Own Nightclub Returns [Curbed LA]
· Play Pinball in This Clubby L.A. Pleasure Palace Asking $26M [Curbed National]
· All That's Rather Hideous posts [Curbed National]