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John Travolta Wire

In light of actor John Travolta's recent Oscars flub (he pronounced Idina Menzel's name "Adele Dazeen"), poses this question: what if Travolta is "secretly Chief Naming Officer at IKEA?" Using Slate's Travoltifier (patent pending, surely) ED translated the titles of Ikea furnishings into, well, surprisingly normal names. BEKKESTUA, for instance, translates to "Brandon Lee" while EXPEDIT (may it rest in peace) reads as "Emily." Read on. []