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Location: Malibu, Calif.
The Skinny: You've got to aim high in this life to achieve your goals, even if you're a house, and even if for some reason one of your goals is to strongly resemble the superstructure of a Carnival Cruise Lines ship puttering along on the Long Beach-to-Puerto Vallarta run. Built on the stucco-and-particleboard ruins of the teardown that once sat on this prime plot extending into the breakers along Malibu's historic La Costa Beach, the design, by a frustratingly unnamed "notable SF architect," is meant to evoke the silhouette of a cruise ship, and it does, sort of—in (to paraphrase Nick Cave) a certain light, from a certain angle. So, mission accomplished, and goal met. Putting aside all the listing folderol about "an ocean liner floating at sea" for a moment, the house features truly gorgeous ocean views and a laundry list of high-end Italian kitchen and bathroom fixtures. It's asking $15.95M.