The nearly year-long string of really, really, ridiculously good-looking homes by midcentury master (and passing Simpsons reference) Richard Neutra hitting the market has ground to an unceremonious halt with this four-bedroom in West Covina. The listing doth protest too much with language like "unique" and "fabulous"; when that's prefaced with "if new owner chooses to keep it," the subdivide and conquer message becomes all too clear. Yes, the 1955 JM Roberts House is in sore need of some TLC, but what it needs even more is a home-rehabbing Enrique Iglesias. Someone to be its hero, baby.
Someone to kiss away the pain of confusing, ominous statements like "includes 14 shares of water-stock; more then enough for a sub-division," or uncommitted ones like "this 3.45 acre 'South Hills' property is a developer or architecture aficionado's dream." For the latter, there's a 2,580-square-foot residence with four bedrooms, three baths, oh-so Neutra-ish walls of glass, beamed ceilings, a large "fossilized" stone fireplace, and original tile that ranges from awesome to less-than. Out back, there's a koi pond, a fire pit, horse pastures, many a mature oak, and a kidney-shaped pool. (Who could say no to a kidney-shaped pool?) Asking price: $1M.