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Wonderfully Awful New Seabury Contemporary Wants Over $1M

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Brace, the above street lamp-pillar-platform-master bedroom is possibly the least shocking thing about this New Seabury listing.

The 3BD, 3BA Contemporary was built - wait for it - in 2002. That's right, this ode to the '80s was built during this century. Per the brokerbabble, every inch of the two-and-a-half-star hotel 5,177 square footer has been customized - kicking off with "numerous custom features," we then find a "custom-built, oak spiral staircase," head out to the "custom stone patio," back in to the "custom floor plan," and chow down in the kitchen that's been "...completely customized, spiral pillars, soffit, and trim" with a "unique three-level customized island and bar." Not surprisingly, 30 Greensward Circle has been lingering on the market for some time (here's a video from September 2013 with some more listing photos, if you can bear it) and is no stranger to the PriceChopper. The asking price after a March chop is - wait for it- $1,199,000.
· Listing: 30 Greensward Circle, Mashpee [Trulia]