When BBC News, apparently extremely skilled in the dark art of lying by omission, called this oddball listing a "seven-bedroom mansion, with sea views and in commuting distance of central London," they technically got all the facts straight. Spacious? Sure! Sea views? You bet! Convenient for commuters? Well, depends on the tide. See, the £500,000 (that's about $800,000) property is not so much a charming beach villa, as brokers might have buyers believe, but rather a bomb-proof, abandoned military fort called Grain Tower Battery, leftover from the 1860s.
Accessible via boat or a helicopter, the bulky cement "sea palace" is in need of some significant repair—just take a peek at the crumbling, graffiti-covered listing photos—but, offers a thick, sturdy frame and a mermaid-ready basin area that could easily become an epic pool deck. At the brokerbabble's insistence, it's also chock-full of potential to be transformed into "a private residence, an offshore hotel, a houseboat community, outdoor pursuit center, film location, nightclub, or a casino, to name a few." Check out a few more shots of the England's coolest new casino/nightclub/fortress, plus some extremely helpful renderings for future endeavors, this way.
· Disused fort on River Thames up for sale [BBC]
· You Could Live in This Concrete Sea Fortress for $800,000 [Architizer]
· No 1 The Thames, Sheerness, ME [Right Move]