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Please, Beyoncé, Do Not Buy This Tasteless $85M Spec Mansion

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Citing "real estate sources," TMZ is claiming that Beyoncé and Jay Z have made "multiple visits" to an exceedingly tacky L.A. home built by billionaire handbag mogul Bruce Makowsky, currently priced at $85M and decorated with Bentley pillows, James Bond murals, chrome machine guns, leopard print blankets, and countless other pieces of juvenile ritzy garbage decor. The irresponsible suggestion that they are interested in buying this home is being repeated here to make it absolutely clear that Beyoncé and Jay Z should not buy this home. It is terrible.

Of all the possible outcomes of the last three days, which will be forever remembered as the biggest rapper real estate bonanza Los Angeles has ever seen—the week that Kanye West and Kim Kardashian listed their half-finished L.A. mansion for $11M, and P. Diddy dropped $39M on an estate with an underwater tunnel—Jay Z and Beyonce buying this flashy, shallow spec mansion would be the worst. Beyonce, if you are reading this, please take Jay Z and Blue Ivy back to the estate you rented earlier this summer. You could just buy that instead. It was fine.

Music's most powerful power couple deserves better than a high-tech garage and a fancy pool with a sterile and forgettable home attached.

· Beyonce and Jay Z eyeing insane $85M mansion [TMZ via Curbed LA]
· Step Inside the L.A. Mansion Good Enough for Beyoncé and Jay Z [Curbed LA]
· $85M L.A. Home is a Crash Course in Gross Millionaire Decor [Curbed National]