When you begin scrolling through the pictures of this pirate-themed "Spanish-Style Hacienda" in Riverside, California (on the market for $1,888,888, a figure that may or may not be a nod to pirates' fondness for pieces of eight) you may at first think to yourself, that's not that pirate-y. Then you get to the bedroom and you think, okay, this must be they meant by pirate-themed. And then you get to the bar/game room and all bets are off. This is it, you think to yourself. There is no way to heighten from here. But then the tour ends with the most pirate-y thing of all: a wooden door with one small, barred window hiding...something. Whatever mystery lies behind that door, you have to be a pirate to find out.